YOU ARE NOT ALONE: DV Resources
A Step-by-Step Guide for Those Experiencing Domestic Violence
Support. Safety. Empowerment.
If You Are in Immediate Danger
Call 911 (U.S.) or your local emergency number.
988 is the Suicide Hotline
Step-by-Step Plan for Your Safety
Step 1: Recognize the Abuse
– Abuse is not just physical. It can also be emotional, verbal, sexual, digital, financial, and psychological.
– You are not to blame for someone else’s behavior.
Step 2: Document Everything (Only If It’s Safe)
– Keep a record of abusive incidents with dates, descriptions, and any evidence (photos, texts, voicemails).
– Store this somewhere safe—use a trusted friend’s home, a secure app, or cloud storage with a hidden password.
Step 3: Create a Safety Plan
– Pack a Go-Bag: Include money, ID, keys, medication, important documents, phone charger, clothing, etc.
– Identify a Safe Exit: Know how to leave quickly and where to go (friend’s house, shelter, public place).
– Teach Children Safety Steps: If applicable, teach them how to call 911 and where to go if violence starts.
Step 4: Reach Out for Support
– National Domestic Violence Hotline (U.S.): 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) or www.thehotline.org
– Talk to someone you trust: a friend, therapist, hotline advocate, or local shelter.
– Usecode wordswith trusted friends/family to signal danger. Make sure your kids know the code words, only the safe people have the code words!
Step 5: Seek Legal Protection
– Consider filing a protective order (restraining order).
– Call your local domestic violence resource center for help with paperwork and court support.
Step 6: Find a Safe Place to Go
– Options include: shelters, transitional housing, or staying with trusted individuals.
– Shelters often provide counseling, legal resources, and safety planning.
Step 7: Take Care of Your Mental and Emotional Health
– You may feel guilt, shame, fear, or confusion. These are normal trauma responses—not your fault. I have a few resources to get you started in the end.
– Seek trauma-informed therapy, counseling, or support groups when safe to do so.
Step 8: Empower Yourself Financially
– Open a bank account in your name (if safe).
– Save small amounts of money over time.
– Keep copies of financial documents, social security cards, and IDs in your go-bag or stored safely.
Important Technology Tips
– Use incognito mode or a safe device to search for help.
– Change passwords frequently.
– Disable location sharing on devices and apps.
You Deserve Safety, Respect, and Peace
There is life after abuse. You are worthy of healing and freedom. Reach out. Take the first step.
Disclaimer:
This handout is for informational and educational purposes only. It is not a substitute for legal advice, professional counseling, or emergency intervention. If you are in immediate danger, please call 911 or your country’s/state’s emergency service. Although I have made every effort to provide accurate and supportive guidance, each situation is unique, so a professional should personalize safety plans whenever possible.
Free Resources:
